A New Scan Result, A New Course of Treatment
Jason here, providing an update on Lindsey.
Since Lindsey's last brain scan (and based on what was observed then), she's had an intervention of a course of steroids, a "steroid taper," and a spinal tap to evaluate if metastatic cancer cells were present in her cerebrospinal fluid, the fluid that surrounds the brain and spinal cord. The steroid taper may have helped her fatigue and fogginess a bit, but we're not sure of much of a change either way. And, fortunately, the CSF was negative for malignant cells.
Additionally, over the last month, Lindsey and the boys have spent a week at the lake with her extended family, our family of 6 have had a week at the beach, and we've seen our older two start fourth and second grade, respectively. From a family perspective we've had some good times but, from Lindsey's health perspective, she's consistently felt fatigued, foggy-headed, and occasionally lost for words, though not seemed to have progressively gotten worse.
Monday evening, Lindsey had a follow up brain MRI, follow up from the inconclusive findings a little over a month ago. Tuesday morning, we met with her radiation oncologist to review and discuss the scan. I/we were expecting to maybe see a limited number of brain mets as that's what was likely apparent in its earliest stage of presentation over a month ago. But, unfortunately, we received pretty devastating news. Lindsey has widespread metastatic cancer all over her brain. The cancer is diffuse and small but present everywhere and with a significant footprint of disease. The radiation oncologist believes this widespread burden of cancer residue in her brain is the likely cause of Lindsey's fatigue and fogginess. Because of the widespread presence of cancer and because chemo/immuno/targeted therapies don't penetrate the brain effectively (due to blood-brain barrier or Lindsey's cancer's acquired resistance), the only real treatment option available is whole brain radiation. Lindsey is scheduled to start a course of whole brain radiation next week. Expected toxicity from such a treatment is not dissimilar to how she currently feels, fatigued and foggy-headed. So, in a sense, it will be a trade of like-for-like symptoms with the likelihood that this will stay the current progression of cancer spread for a while. We are sort of running out of preferable options, or good options, you could say.
As you can imagine, yesterday was a hard and sad day for us, for Lindsey especially. Please pray for her, and for us, as we process this new reality. Specifically, pray for both of us coming to grips with one awkward and surreal reality: Lindsey will be treated at my workplace. I am a radiation physicist (medical physicist) and Lindsey is now a patient where she’s historically visited me and brought the boys to go see daddy at work. This has been an especially hard reality for Lindsey to face. And it’s been jarring to me as well.
For those who may wonder how she's doing physically, those local and in her sphere of overlap would affirm the following reality: when you see Lindsey, you wouldn't believe that she has cancer advancing like this inside her. She really looks beautiful, healthy, and has her wit and charm about her, as always. Yes, she looks a little tired at times and would tell you that but is very much Lindsey. Receiving this news yesterday is another cruel reminder along this journey of how looks can be deceiving.
We have taken real refuge in the promise found in verse 18 of Psalm 34. (Thank you Mallory for sending as a reminder to Linds yesterday). "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
Thank you all for your continued support and care for us as we walk this journey. For your well wishes, your notes, your tangible gifts, your meals, your help with errands and our kids, and for your prayers, we cannot thank you enough. We feel very loved and supported.
